IT HAS BEEN 77 DAYS SINCE I CLOSED
DOLLED UP DESSERTS
(listen to this reflection in the video above!)

I’d be lying to you if I said I was sad.
If I said I missed the the painfully slow week days hoping today would be the day James street’s foot traffic came back to life.
If I missed shooting up in panic in the middle of the night dreaming about whether the freezers were still on at the bakery.
If I missed having to once again put on my confident face for my staff or customers asking if things have gotten better since we “opened back up”.
These last three years were hard for all of us. For me, these last three years slated me into the worst burnout of my life.
On this journey of growing a bakery, I have failed due to extreme circumstances out of my control on three separate occasions, yet I still found the will to see it as an opportunity to pivot again.
I’ve only realized now by removing myself that each time I got up again, a bit of me was still stuck to the floor. Each time I thought I regained my balance and strength, I was fueled increasingly by anxiety, guilt and stubbornness.
I was a shell of myself for the year leading up to our close.
Disconnected, uninspired, angry, doom scrolling, going through the motions.

Honestly, I never wanted Dolled Up Desserts to have a store. It was a last ditch effort made in the peak of the pandemic to try and get my employees back to the familiar constant that is work, and ride out what we all thought would be the last few months of lockdowns so we could once again try to build out the Dolled Up empire.
I signed the lease at 142 James for 6 months- that’s how short term this was supposed to be. Two and a half years passed. Although the store was incredible for building community, our mission was always to bring inclusive dessert to as many places as possible.
I started Dolled Up Desserts because I was done settling for the lack of indulgent treats that I could eat in my city. Dessert is a language of positivity, and people with dietary differences are physically prevented from feeling the connection dessert cultivates between people. Allergen friendly baked goods were often designed to be “good enough”, an inconvenient afterthought for most establishments. They were often something your friend would not want to split with you, something that was separately yours, while everyone else at the birthday party got a slice of that beautiful decadent confetti cake.
I was someone who detested “the option” at all places, because it had, as I like to call, the “vegan” taste or its glutenless texture was that of cardboard. It was never the satisfying indulgence I dreamt of: cake with the tang of real cream cheese icing; buns that were fluffy and light; or ice cream that was creamy and didn’t taste like coconut. So, I chased those sugar coated dreams. Dolled Up Desserts was its manifestation.
BUT IF I SAID I DON’T MISS THAT DREAM, WHY AM I WRITING TO YOU NOW?
Because I do miss parts of it.

I’d be lying to you if I said I didn’t miss being creative with pushing what inclusive dessert could be.
I baked for myself for the first time in 6 years the second week after closing. Baking once was a way for me to unwind after a long day, ending with the best kind of medicine: dessert. I transformed baking for fun into my biggest passion and pain while running the business.
Now, baking has once again become personalized. And through the act of baking for myself, experiences I forgot or brushed aside to keep looking forward are resurfacing.
I’d also be lying if I said I didn’t miss you, the community.
During the weeks leading up to our close, many of you asked if I would ever publish a recipe book. Although I would love to do just that, I want the act of sharing Dolled Up’s recipes, formulas so dear to my heart, to be an act of building connection, just like the baked goods brought connection to your special occasions.
Thus, to help build a deeper sense of connection to myself and to you, I have decided to share these recipes openly and freely, paired with the story, challenge, life lesson, or triumph that occurred during the time the recipe was conceived.
Sharing my story this way is part healing and learning, part building connection with you and the loved ones that get to enjoy your baking. One day, we can publish these recipes into a beautiful book, and I certainly hope you’ll support me in that endeavor. But for now, these recipes need to empower my community as much as they empowered me to experience the life changing opportunity that is Dolled Up Desserts. Maybe they’ll inspire you to do something crazy (like open your own business), but at the very least, I hope they inspire you to get baking.
There is no hard timeline set with the launch of this reflection capsule. I’ll share the recipes and stories when I’m ready. If you want to stay updated, be sure to sign up for the newsletter and continue to follow dolled up desserts on social media.
Thank you for joining me on this journey. I look forward to sharing my legacy with you,connecting with you personally, and baking inclusive dessert together once again.
Until next time,
Katarina
Hi, I'm Katarina!
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